Letters to my daughter
Somewhere along the way I’ve lost my baby. I remember vividly the day she was born like it was yesterday, although nearly 20 years have passed. She was a beautiful baby, but she has grown into a stunning young woman. She is intelligent, funny and goofy as the day is long. She once said she would live with me forever. I was foolish enough to believe it. For every bird must leave the nest and spread their wings and fly. But MY baby girl isn’t merely flying - she’s soaring. And I am so proud of her. Of the woman she’s become.
But as I said, I’ve lost her. You see…I held on too tightly. I didn’t give her the air she thrives on. And I miss her; this wonderful creature. I would do anything to spend one more day with her as a child. And I wouldn’t hold on so tightly. I’d go to more school events. I would have given her a safer place to live.
As one way comminication is better than none, i will continue to write to her in this venue.
I know you’re reading this my dear. I love you infinity times infinity.
Love always and ever,
I miss my daughter Madison. She is my youngest at 19 and the one I’m having the hardest time letting go of. She, however, has had no compunction about letting go of me. Which I guess is as it should be. Doesn’t stop me from missing her like craxy. When she was little, she used to tell me she was going to live with me forever.i knew it was too good to be true. I do, however, wish she would text or call me, even if it is just once a month. Anyhow, learning to let go is damn hard.
Adult children and empty nests
I have been blessed with a son and two daughters. They are beautiful, intelligent adults now. I would sincerely like to know the name of the fucker who decided they should have their own lives. Lol. Seriously though, my only beef with these 3 wonderful young adults is that I hear from and see them very rarely. I understand this is called “empty nest syndrome”. I prayed for this when they were young. They are 18 and 20 months apart respectively. If I could say one thing to parents of very young children, it would be to “enjoy this age, because once the time is gone, you’ll never get it back again”. To the adult children out there, please know you will always be your parents’ child. They want you to have your own life. They just don’t want to be forgotten in the process. So…call your mother (or father) once in a while!
It’s a no good very bad day.
All in all, today was disasterville. My youngest nephew has a stomach bug, my niece (his mom) fell twice. Depression is running rampant in our home and I’m questioning my faith. I’m not entirely sure i want to hang out for the rest of this picture show. and some jerk i’d met on one of those online dating sites had the audacity, after only 6 text messages, to call ME a flake. Sorry to disappoint you Mr. Capricorn. I have a life other than you. And besides…i’m an aquarius. I’m one of a kind, not flaky. Still pissed me off.
For those of you who don’t know, my youngest daughter also has a blog here. I will spare her much humiliation by keeping her username private. But i call her “the bug”, which is a nickname her late stepfather gave her when she was 5. So when i refer to “bug”, please know it is a person…not an insect. Love you Buggy.
Sometimes…well, let’s be honest, most times i feel useless and wortless. All my kids are grown and gone. I am a displaced mother. The only thing good i’ve ever done is raise my children into the great people they are today. My husband died,making me a widow at 45. Too old to date anf too young to be alone. I’m disabled, which makes it hard to find work. And still, i am better off than a lot of people. So i’ll take that as my inspiration of the day. Thank you for listening.